Mary's Beads

As I've stated before, this project has transcended itself from a means of keeping my grandmother's memory alive to something else entirely. I now have beads not only from my grandmother, but from all of her daughters as well, which as I said before, is a wonderful way of memorializing all five remarkable women.

I haven't yet taken pictures of Claire's bead contributions (or my mother's for that matter), but I do have pictures of the wonderful contributions Mary has made. First up is a strand of pearls and crystals.


According to Mary's letter, Mary had made this necklace and given it to Aunt Jan many years ago. It's a beautiful strand that I've already enjoyed using.

The second picture is of some red and silver beads that also belonged to a necklace Jan use to wear as well.


Mary also contributed some fun seed and crystal beads as well as some unique glass beads.




These contributions have been a lot of fun to work with and use. I've already used some of them in some very unique ways. Thanks again Aunt Mary, for your lovely contribution.

Rosary Updates

It's been awhile since I've written a post for the rosary blog, which is not to say that I haven't been busy with rosary related stuff, because I have been. Super busy in fact, busy up to my eyeballs, not just with making rosaries, but with news and the such.

For starters, I had the chance to go back to Iowa (where my grandmother was from) for a wedding (Congrats Pete and Tammi! It was a beautiful wedding and reception!) and I got a chance to catch up with all the family that I hadn't seen since her funeral. Also, I completed a bunch of rosaries and actually delivered a few in person to various family members. The pictures will follow soon. On top of that, my mother was headed straight to Australia soon after I saw her in Iowa to see the family on the other side of the pond and to deliver a few other rosaries to Mary's kids, which were received well. She got back with with all sorts of goodies from Cyndi, and all sorts of pictures and stories. I look forward to posting all that as well.

This project has continued to affect me in ways I never thought possible, starting with the
kindness and generosity of my family. I've been awestruck with the outpouring of good tidings and kind words I've received about the project. I've also been blown away by how everyone is willing and has willingly contributed to the project. I now have beads from all four of my grandmother's daughters, (Thanks Aunt Clare, Aunt Mary, and Mom, and again, thanks Cyndi for Aunt Jan's beads). I think it's really significant and important that I'm able to honor all five remarkable women in this family with my bead work. I'm stunned and flattered to be doing this.

I also have new (well, relatively speaking) beads that were worn by two of my Great-aunts (my grandmother's sisters) that were gifted to me by a wonderful woman who I am now indebted to (Thanks Great, and I do mean Great, Aunt Doris!!! I'm still awestruck by your contribution). The new beads plus the incredible antique rosaries are enough to keep me busy for ages. I'll try and document everything I received, so everyone can get idea of how grand a gesture this was. Again, Thank you so much Great-Aunt Doris!!!

On top of all that, I've also received some monetary compensation (which, Aunt Clare, you really shouldn't have, but thank you just the same!).

So keep posted for more news and more pictures on everything I've done so far. Thanks again to everyone for their love and support on this project and for all the feedback. I'm so excited for the coming months and what it will mean for this project.

Tylia

Thanks Marcus

There are certain people in your life who will always have this larger than life presence. Either by their personality, or their actions, they just stand out. My cousin Marcus has always been that to me. He has always been someone I've looked up to and admired, and his image has never been tarnished in my mind.

I can remember the first time I met him. I was three and he was this cool-looking eighteen-year-old ski guy and I couldn't believe I was related to him. I kept pestering him and playing with him. He was very cool about having to entertain a three year-old and from then on he had idol-like status in my mind. Flash-forward, past his olympic ski-jumping career (although that only fueled the fire of my adoration) to my first trip to Australia. I was seventeen, still impressionable, definately very naive, and Marcus gave me my first taste of city night life, dragging me out to the clubs of Melbourne with his friends (who wore snakeskin pants, which, whoa), passing me off as eighteen (I didn't even get carded!) and buying me mimosas(I think). I was trying to pass off as mature and Marcus let me actually believe I was, further cementing his larger than life status in my head.

He's the guy I bragged about: 'Yeah, my cousin in Australia has his own TV program. He used to be an Olympic Ski-jumper. He's so awesome.' He's the guy I think fondly on, and sometimes envy: 'Dude gets to go to Tahoe and write it off for work. So jealous." The kid in me, who he's never let down, believes he could maybe, possibly, walk on water someday. I wouldn't put it past him.

My mom told me that he put on the rosary I made for him and hasn't taken it off. He keeps it hidden underneath his shirt, but wears it all the time. I cried. It was sincerely the most touching thing he could've ever done for me, although he probably doesn't know it. I just figured he'd think it was a touching gesture and would put it away in a box somewhere. I don't know why, but I didn't think he'd be that into it. 'It's Marcus. He's too cool for that.' I thought. To think about him wearing the rosary everyday, that it means that much to him... it just makes me emotional. It's hard to put into words how it's effected me. I feel like that three year-old looking up at him again.

Thanks Marcus. You don't know how much that simple gesture means to me.

I wrote the above piece a few days after we lost Lisa because I found out Marcus put on the rosary I made for him and hasn't taken it off. I've let this little post sit for some time because I guess I felt it didn't need to be said, I don't know. But I think I still need to get it out there. Since I wrote it (but I hadn't posted it) Marcus wrote me to thank me for the necklace and to let me know that he had attached an L to the necklace, so that he would have his mother and his sister with him always. I just wanted to let him know that it meant alot to me. I hope this post conveys the point.

The Story of the Butterflies

Since Lisa's death, I've felt kind of caught in an undertow of sorts. There's been a flurry of activity, both with work and with interpersonal stuff, which either I didn't want to talk about or felt I couldn't. But despite the grief and the depression I've felt from all this, I've had some truly uplifting moments, some blessed moments.

The previous post from Cyndi stemmed from a recent conversation we had a week or so. It was the best conversation, filled with laughter and tears. There were several things said that utterly uplifted me, but none more so than a story I shared with Cyndi and the story she shared back.

The day of Lisa's Memorial, I went for a hike. I had to go somewhere beautiful as a way of saying goodbye. I took the dog and I brought a lunch. I went to this beautiful land preserve called Morgan Territories which was an easy drive from home. It was an absolutely perfect day. The sun was shining, but it wasn't too hot, it was completely clear. I full expected to grieve, to give myself the room to cry and release all the emotions that were pent up in me since her death. But on the hike I didn't feel any of that. The second I stepped out of the car and started walking the hills, I couldn't. I just felt uplifted, knowing she was in a better place now, with her mother, our grandmother and the rest of our family. At the end of the hike I saw these two butterflies, fluttering around each other, these two dainty white butterflies just flying and circling each other. A third white butterfly joined them, fluttering and flying about, but then broke off as the other two flew off and away. That third one flew by and around me briefly and then flew off. I said it felt like a sign, that Grandma, Jan and Lisa are together someplace safe and Lisa broke off to briefly say goodbye. It's what I needed.

I told Cyndi this because it brought me a measure of comfort after everything, and I just thought she should know. She gasped a little and said. "Lisa loved butterflies. Her house was filled with butterflies. At her memorial, someone had set a butterfly with her." It's been two weeks since I heard this and it still brings tears to my eyes. I could've never expected that. I still don't fully know what it means. It could just be coincidence, but I don't think so. I think I was given what I needed to say goodbye, intentionally, and for that I'm grateful.

And for this I am grateful, for the opportunity to share these thoughts and emotions with the family.

Regarding the rosaries, Cyndi said she'd send me some of Lisa's Jewelry for the rosary project and that she'd like something made for herself, which I'm more than happy to do. I also plan to make my Aunt Mary's two children rosaries, so keep checking back for updates and new rosaries in the coming months.

More On Lisa

My cousin Cyndi sent me a wonderful e-mail, putting to light for the entire family more details on Lisa's death, but also on her life. I thought I'd share the lovely story with the rest of the family.

My Sister Lisa
By Cyndi O'meara

Lisa and I were typical sisters, we played together when we were young, fought madly during our teenage years and then became lasting friends as we blossomed into adulthood.

Lisa was amazing. She had a mind that wouldn’t stop, she was an avid reader, an endless student and a person who thought very differently and loved to break the rules. Her life was filled with love, adventure and excitement. She loved to travel and she managed to visit every continent on the planet.

When she was 18 she left Bendigo Australia, to study in the USA, to become a Chiropractor, during those 5 years, she played, studied and worked hard. She came home and traveled Australia doing locums, then finally setting up practice in Armadale Victoria. She had a thriving practice and her patients and staff loved her. She was diagnosed with a disease called CREST, an acronym for Calcinosis, raynards phemomon, oesophagitis, scleroderma and talangatalia. The doctors said it was a fatal disease, telling her she would probably only live another 10 years they told her to keep warm and stop smoking and take a bunch of drugs. Lisa didn’t stop smoking, she didn’t take the drugs but decided to move to QLD to keep warm, she also followed a strict diet and had weekly massages and Chiropractic care to keep her tissue soft and supple. It worked because she managed to live another 23 years after that diagnosis.

While in Melbourne Lisa wrote the book ‘Immunity Why Not Keep It”, it was the first of its kind in Australia, warning people about the dangers of vaccination. Now there are a plethora of books on this subject both in Australia and overseas.

Lisa went to South America, just before she moved to Queensland and managed to get hepatitis A, she became very ill, very yellow and very thin. But as always she had a fighting spirit, and came back from what I thought was to be her demise.

She continued to travel, had a thriving business on Bribie Island, taught seminars within the Chiropractic profession and became a mentor to many Chiropractic students and a keen investor for her independence.

Lisa and I were now only 40 minutes from each other and we both depended on each other for many things. Lisa was the person I would always call if I had a difficult question that needed an amazing mind to solve it. She always solved it with simplicity and enabled me to calm down about an issue or to get on with what I needed to get on with. She helped look after my children and was the most amazing Aunt. She always came home from her travels with gifts abounding for all of us. One year for my children’s birthdays she surprised each of them with a unique gift. For Tarnea she flew both of them down to Sydney for the weekend to stay at an expensive motel, see the musical The Lion King and enjoy the sights of Sydney. For Casie and Fran she flew them and herself down to Melbourne to stay at a resort spa and enjoy the luxury of being pampered and for Brogan she flew them both to New Zealand to watch the All Blacks rugby team play. A year they will not forget.

Lisa was generous, that’s an understatement. She would always pay for me whenever we went out for a meal, she did so much.

In 2005, she began to lose weight rapidly and was having difficulty eating, she thought it was the end of her CREST disease and believed the oesophagitis would be her demise. In March 2006 she woke one morning and couldn’t even get water down let alone food, we rushed her to Holy Spirit hospital in Brisbane, where she was put on a drip. She weighed 35 kg, there was nothing of her, and with only saline going into her veins she was losing more and more weight. She looked like a skeleton and I feared so much I was going to lose her. Between Mum, Dad and I we stayed with her in the hospital while tests were done. The wonderful Dr Andrew Lee was her gastroenterologist, he diagnosed an 8 cm tumour on the oesophegas. He recommended radiation and an operation to remove not only the tumour but 10 cm of her oesophegus. Lisa never listens to authority and once again she said she didn’t want to do it. She knew that her quality of life with both treatments would decrease forever and she said she would rather have quality rather then quantity when it came to her life.

We took her home from the hospital with a feeding tube down her nose and into her stomach and we fed her through the tube. We decided to go natural, vegetable juices, whey protein powder, colloidal minerals, ambrotose, essential fatty acids, essiac tea, chicken broths and mushroom extract. We managed to block the tube up a few times experimenting, which was a very scary prospect because there is no other way to get water and food into her.

She lived with Mum and Dad for around 3 months and then got a tube straight into her stomach so that she could walk down the street without everyone looking. She gained weight, got up to 41 kg, went back to work, ran her business and investments and managed to live well. In August of 2006 she flew down to the Mountains and went skiing for the week. The doctors gave her three months and within four she was skiing down the slopes of Mount Hotham. She was amazing! She also started to drink fluids and was able to get some food down, tim tams, friands and chocolate brownies were her favourite, but she also managed to drink smoothies.

All was doing well but then Mum died in the October of 2006 and her slow death as a result of mesothelioma took its toll on Lisa. After Mum’s death Lisa managed to make her way back and started to feel better and have more energy again. Christmas and New Year went and things seemed to be doing fine.

In March she decided she wanted a scan to find out the size of the tumour. It didn’t look good, it still looked the same size in length, but it looked like it was spreading in width. Lisa didn’t see that as a problem, she never saw anything as a problem she was only optimistic about everything.

After Lisa’s diagnosis she started seeing a psychologist, she not only wanted to work on the physical and chemical part of her body but also the mental state. Her psychologist’s name was Jaqueline Trost, an 82 year old amazing lady who worked in Nambour, not far from me. Sometimes Lisa and I would meet at the organic Café Sister to Sister in Palmwoods and talk for an hour, until her appointment. On February the 5th we met there and cried for the hour. A good friend of mine had passed away the day before from Liver Cancer, a secondary to breast cancer, she was 39 years old. The next time we met was the Wednesday before Lisa died, she was energetic, full of life and unstoppable. The owner of Sister to Sister, Hayley joined us for the hour, she had just lost her sister (36 years old) to a brain tumour in the November of 2006. We talked about her sister Rikki, we talked about Lisa and her cancer, and Lisa was vivacious and full of hope for a wonderful future. She hadn’t looked this good or sounded this good since August the year before. It was great to see her with such hope and love of life.

Lisa and I spoke on the Thursday and again on the Friday and both times she said she felt she was back to where she was in August. She told me to touch wood and I told her I’d touched the tree of knowledge, we both laughed. On Saturday we meet in Caloundra and went to the musical The Secret Garden, Lisa looked gorgeous but she told me she was vomiting up a little blood and felt like she hit the wall that morning and wasn’t doing so well. The musical we went to was about spirits living with people and helping them in there every day lives.

On the Sunday morning Lisa called me, but I was in a seminar and I texted her to tell her that I would call her at 1.00 pm when the morning session was over. I called her as soon as I got out but got no reply from her mobile or land line. I thought that was not right and began to worry, but I had a talk to give at 2.00 pm across town so I decided I’d call her when I finished my talk. At 1.55 pm Dad called to tell me that Lisa was in emergency and that she was vomiting up a lot of blood, I told Dad that I would do the talk and get straight to the hospital.

For some reason I knew that for Lisa this set back would be hard for her to come back from. She was getting to the point that she was sick of the set backs and at times didn’t want to fight anymore. I called my good friend Jacki and cried to her believing that Lisa wouldn’t want to fight this.

I got to the emergency room of the hospital and was immediately bombarded with nurses and doctors asking me to make a decision. Apparently the tumour had encroached on a major blood vessel and the bleeding didn’t seem to want to stop. There were two choices: One was to stabalize her and send her to Brisbane to the specialists. The other was to wait and see. I called a very good friend who is an upper gastro surgeon and spoke to him, I then called Lisa’s specialist Dr. Andrew Lee and talked to him also. He felt that if Lisa was operated on that her chances of survival were slim.

With all the information I went back to Lisa where Dad was sitting beside her, he looked as lost and worried as was I. I grabbed Lisa’s hand and told her I loved her and that she had been the best sister, she looked me in the eye and said “Am I dying?”, I then said to her that she was bleeding and we couldn’t stop the bleeding. She then said to me “I’m tired and I’m ready to go”.

We took her out of emergency and into a private room where Lisa was hooked up to morphine and blood. She had started to experience pain and she felt if she was going to die that she might as well enjoy it and be comfortable. She had an amazing attitude.

I grabbed her hand and talked to her, telling her how much I loved her and that I was going to miss her. She asked me to call Trent.

Before calling Trent, I called Marcus. I called him at 7.00pm and told him that Lisa probably wouldn’t make it through the night, he managed to break all speed limits and get to Melbourne airport in time for the last plane to Brisbane, he arrived 12.00 that night.

I called Trent, Trent is a 28 year old boy who has been writing to Lisa every year for the past 20 years. You see 28 years ago Lisa gave Trent up for adoption to a wonderful family in Melbourne. Lisa didn’t know Trent’s identity all she knew was his first name and through a service she managed to communicate with him once a year. She loved the letters from Trent and I would make her read the letters to me 2 and 3 times. About 18 months before Lisa died I decided that Trent had given us enough information that I could find him through the internet. It took me a couple of days but by the end of it I had his home phone number and his address. I didn’t intend on using it for any other purpose but in an emergency and this was an emergency.

When I called Trent I told him I was Cyndi O’Meara, Lisa Lovett’s sister. I explained why I was calling and he asked me to give him some time to comprehend all that was happening. I gave him my husband’s number as they do not allow phones on in the hospital. Once Lisa was in her private room, a nurse came in and told me there was a call for Lisa from her son Trent and would we take the call. I asked Lisa and she gave me a definite nod. Lisa and Trent spoke for the first time that night, it meant a lot to Lisa. Trent then sent us a photo of himself that we managed to copy and show to Lisa before she died.

Before Marcus arrived I talked to Lisa about her options. I told her about the operation, and the chances of survival and then I told her that we could stop giving her blood transfusions and she could die peacefully with us around her. She looked at me and she told me that her goal was Robust Health and if she couldn’t have it she didn’t want to live. She was determined but I had to ask her again. So at midnight when Marcus and Susannah arrived we talked to Lisa again and then we took the blood transfusions away.

We called key people in Lisa’s life and told them what was happening, my family came down, along with Jacki Postles. Barbara her best friend and receptionist also arrived. As it was getting late, my family left, but Casie decided she wanted to stay. By this time Marcus and Susannah had arrived. So around Lisa’s bed was Barbara, Marcus, Susannah, Casie and me. We talked through the night and every now and then Lisa would put her two cents in. She managed to fire Barbara her receptionist for the past 10 years (all in jest), and she also asked Marcus if she was dead yet. She was really very comical and still wanting to have the last word.

The morning came and I called more friends who said they were coming straight away. Lisa could now only nod slightly or utter grunts of approval or disapproval, then her breathing changed and I knew what was happening. I couldn’t believe that I was losing my sister. I left the room to heave the pain out of me, it wouldn’t go. Barbara came out to help me and she managed to create some strength so that I could go back into Lisa and be with her without tears and sorrow.

At 10.30 am I said to Dad that I could feel Mum in the room and my two uncles Denny and Carl who had all passed away previously. They had come to greet Lisa to take her onto her next great adventure.

We were all around her as she took her final breaths on 26th March 2007 at 10.50am, she did it with such grace and dignity and I realized then that not only was birth a miracle but so was death.

I believe that the conscious continues after the body has stopped working, I believe that Lisa is free from the body that stopped her from doing what she wanted to do, more adventure, more living and more excitement. Lisa and I often spoke of death and what was after it, she was very philosophical and often calmed my own fears. I no longer fear death as I’ve seen both my mother and sister go through it. What is amazing is that death has a sweet smell both my sister and mother had that same smell, just like birth has its distinct smell.

Lisa has not left me, I feel her with me a lot. I’ve had a dream about her and she guides me to help me through her passing. I have never cried so much as I have cried in the last 5 months since the passing of Mum and Lisa. A couple of weeks after Lisa died I was quite up set and some how I ended up in a store and made a direct line for the book section. There were five books that caught my eye on death and dying, but the two I bought were on life after death. Both books have given me amazing comfort in the knowledge that Lisa and Mum and Grandma are free spirits basking in the light of God and enjoying their next adventure.

As a nutritionist, author and speaker on health I began to doubt what I was saying was right, especially after the death of Lisa and Mum from cancer. How could I possibly help other people if I couldn’t even help my own family? I thought about quitting but Lisa through the book she guided me to read after her passing helped me realize the truth. Deepak Chopra’s book, Life After Death made me realize that I needed to continue to talk and write about health. You see, in Deepak’s book he tells of his father and mother dying from diseases. The message was clear; keep going.

Not a day goes by that I don’t think of Lisa and Mum. I’ve had two vivid dreams of both of them, one night after the other, Lisa first and then Mum, they were just telling me they were OK and happy. I still go to pick up the phone to talk to Lisa and then realize I don’t need the phone anymore. I can just talk to her.

I will miss them both very much, but know that my time and work on this planet is not finished so what seems like an eternity to me, it could be another 50 or more years that I have to live without them and before I see my mother and sister again, it will be but a second in time for them.

Till we meet again, I love you and will always keep your memories alive.

Cyndi O’Meara

Thanking My Dad

It's been on my mind seems like forever. It felt like you should know, dad, one way or another. I had taken it for granted all those years, but I'm not taking it for granted now. It didn't go how I had planned, but I had said it and you knew, you know how I feel.

"Dad, I might turn into a big puddle goo and I might start crying but I have to say this."
"What's that sweetheart?"
"You might not remember this, but I was nine, mom was up in Iowa and we were at home waiting on word about uncle T's condition. We got a call, you answered it and found out that he died. You got off the phone, you told me and I dissolved into a puddle of tears. You swooped me up in your arms, sat me on your lap and let me cry. Thank You."

I mean it. It was the perfect response to what I was going through. No words, no comforting cliches. Just me and your shoulder to cry on. It was exactly what I needed. It might not have been what you needed. You were there for mom and me through everything we went through. You were our comfort, our rock, our support, and in most instances you did so forsaking your own grief, your own need for comfort. They were just as important to you as they were to mom. They were your brothers as they were her brothers, but you were rarely able to attend a funeral. Those were tough heartbreaking times. The thing is, I've always thought about those times in terms of mom's heart break, my heart break, grandma's heart break. But your heart break was just as palpable, but you kept it at bay for me and mom.

I remember that 6:00 am phone call I received when grandma died, and how Chris said nothing. He just held me and let me cry. The perfect response to what I needed. I also think on the fact that you were all alone. My mom and I had each other at grandma's funeral, but you were alone, suffering silently.

After I told you this, you said:

"Sometimes we get it right. Sometimes we get it right. Now stop it. You're making me cry and I'm driving." I think you called me a little shit-ass (you've really got to come up with a better term of endearment) and then we said goodbye. I'd say you got it right more than a few times. I love you, you old BAI (Blooming-Ass Idiot, guess I've got to come up with a better term of endearment, too. Old habits die hard.) and thanks again.

The Stories About My Grandmother

Here are two of the many articles John Carlson wrote for the Des Moines Register concerning our family. I've copied and pasted them into the blog with permission from John Carlson. The first one was the story he wrote regarding her 90th birthday. The second was the story he wrote when she died. They both perfectly sum up and explain our family story better than I ever could. Thanks again John Carlson. If these articles have been put up with out the correct permissions, please let me know and I'll take them down immediately.

- Sunday, June 13, 2004

Headline: No one deserves a happy birthday more than Mary

John Carlson's IOWA

An Iowa family gathered for a birthday party a few days ago, celebrating 90 years of life for a fine lady.

They had cake, told stories of life back on the farm and shared some laughs.

There was a time, not all that many years ago, when anybody who heard of the suffering wondered if the Goedkens would ever smile again.

No family more deserves a happy time. No lady is more worthy of celebration than Mary Goedken, their mother, grandmother and great-grandmother.

She has been through more troubles than any 10 people should have to endure.
First came the death of an 11-year-old son, Tommy, in 1971, of the hemophilia that ravaged the family.

Then, beginning in March 1987 and continuing the next 10 years, came the loss of five more sons -Ernie, Carl, Dennis, J.J. and Loras -two daughters-in-law and a grandchild -all eight from AIDS.

The five sons contracted HIV after taking a contaminated blood product designed to treat their hemophilia. Dennis and Loras unknowingly passed it on to their wives. The baby, Clayton, contracted the virus from his pregnant mother.

Remarkably, few people in Monticello realized what was happening to the family. The country was just learning of HIV and AIDS, and much of the talk was harsh. It was, most believed, a disease confined to gays -certainly not something that would decimate a "nice" family.

The Goedkens, a stoic, German Catholic family, barely spoke of it, even amongst themselves.

Ernie died and the reason given was hepatitis. Others died and friends were told it was pneumonia or vague illnesses related to hemophilia. It was an unimaginable silent suffering.

Mary got herself to Mass every morning at Sacred Heart Catholic Church in Monticello, just a few blocks from the little house she shared with her husband, Vince.

It was, she said, her strength.

I came to know Mary in 1993, when she and the rest of the family allowed me to tell their story in the Register. Every person interviewed, at some point, spent a few minutes talking about her. Not because they were prompted or asked. It was because they respected her so much and looked to her for strength.

"Mom's the strongest one of the bunch," Loras told me. "I guess she has to be to endure this."

Nobody doubted it.

People heard about the family tragedy and used words such as "unimaginable" and "horrific." No description seemed adequate.

Mary quietly led them through it.

She told me she did it through faith and, incredibly, without tears.

"I was afraid if I started crying, I'd never be able to stop," she said one day, sitting at the kitchen table, carefully turning the pages of photo albums filled with pictures of her dead sons.

Their story was told, and the community responded with a love and support none in the family could have imagined.

"People have been so nice," Mary said. "I'm glad they finally know what happened."
Vince Goedken, Mary's husband of 61 years, died in February 1997.

Loras was dead six months later, the last to be taken by AIDS. Mary was with him, at his home in Houston, when he died. She gave her son comfort at the end, and when he was gone, washed his body, helped dress him and said goodbye.

She came back to Monticello and, a few years ago, moved into a nursing home. Trips to church are fewer now, but the faith remains.

"She says the rosary three or four times a day," said Steve, her surviving son, the only one not born with hemophilia. "That's very important to her."

At 90, she tires easily but enjoys her life. And she gets confused from time to time, Steve said. "She'll say, `Why haven't Loras or J.J. come to see me?' Then I'll remind her what happened and she remembers right away. She just kind of shakes her head and wonders how that could have happened to us. But she's doing very well, considering everything."

The birthday party originally was planned as a community gathering, but the family thought it might be too much for Mary. As it was, about 50 family members were there.

Clare, a daughter, said it was a fine day for her mother.

"She had a wonderful time," Clare said. "People came from all over. Nobody wanted to miss it. Really, it's hard to imagine she's still here, given all that she's gone through. I'm really proud of her. We're all very proud of her."

I'm proud to know her.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Headline: AIDS stole her sons; now `Mom's home,' too

John Carlson's IOWA

I'd been in this business nearly 20 years and was walking into what almost certainly would be the most difficult interview of my life.

What do you say to a woman who had lost four sons, two daughters-in-law and a grandson to AIDS?

The lady across the kitchen table in the tiny Monticello house smiled and offered me tea. A private, quiet person, she was uncomfortable as well, not quite certain of herself or what to say. So she did the only thing she was capable of doing.

She told the absolute truth about the unimaginable tragedy that had decimated her rural Iowa family.

It turned out to be a fine interview. For both of us, I think. She hadn't said much about it to anybody but family and clergy, and she opened up, answering every question, almost relieved to be able to say things that had been held inside for a very long time.

Mary Goedken talked about raising a family with six of her seven sons suffering from hemophilia, the youngest, Tommy, dying of the disease at age 10.

And how a blood-based treatment, something that was to make their lives so much easier, had infected five of her boys with HIV. And how two of those sons unknowingly infected their wives. And how a grandson was born with HIV. And how all but one had died of AIDS.

That was in 1993. Four years later, another son died. That's eight members of her family taken by AIDS in a 10-year period, more than any family in America to die of the disease.

Now Mary is gone. She died Monday at the age of 91.

One Iowan read their story in the Register and wrote a letter to the editor that read, in part, "They say God never gives you more than you can handle -I wonder."

I've known people who have talked about their faith being tested, that they didn't think they could endure whatever they were facing at the moment.

I wish I could have introduced them all to Mary.

Every day of her adult life -at least until she became too ill -she went to Mass at Sacred Heart Catholic Church in Monticello. Her sons' funeral cards were always with her.

Faith, she said again and again, is what got her through it all.

That and strength, a tiny woman holding up an entire family.

"I live from day to day and keep going," she once told me. "I go to Mass every morning. That seems to be where I can get relief. . . . I just can't believe the six of them (her sons) are gone. I think about it, and I just can't believe it."

I got to know her a little better and felt comfortable telling her that I was amazed she could discuss these deaths in such excruciating detail without crying.

"I didn't cry," she said, describing how she coped with the 1988 death of her son, Carl. It's something that stayed with her through it all. "I was afraid if I started crying I'd never be able to stop."

Steve, the one Goedken son who was born "healthy," without hemophilia, shook his head in amazement and gratitude describing his mom.

"I marvel at her," he said in 1997 as the family prepared to bury Loras, the last to die of AIDS. "Until you're a parent, you don't understand what it might be like to lose a child, the heartbreak and the emptiness you must feel. And she's been through that six times. . . . I don't have an answer, except the obvious -a strong faith and the belief that they will all be reunited again some day. She believes that, and so do I."

It's hard to be absolutely certain what comes after death, and I certainly have no credentials to speak on that score.

But I'd like to think Mary and Steve were right, that very early Monday morning, a few seconds after Mary took her final breath, she heard a half-dozen very happy boys yelling the very same thing:

"Mom's home."

The Rosary Project Story This Far

So, about bi-weekly, my mother (Hi Mom! 'Sup, all her kids at Loving High School! She says you've checked out the site. I just thought I'd say hi!) has been calling me with stories from our family in Australia. Apparantly, the rosaries I've sent them have had a pretty big impact on the family. I won't tell you their stories here. They aren't mine to tell. I'll leave that up to the individual members if they want to contribute. When mom told me some of their stories, I couldn't help but get a little emotional. I wasn't aware that something so simple as a rosary was having that tremendous effect on the family.

This project has affected me in ways I never knew it could. So far, it has surpassed any expectations I could have had for it. All I wanted was to let everyone in the family have a piece of our grandmother that they could treasure. I'm coming to find out that the rosaries happen to be doing a lot more than that. For some, they are bringing solace and comfort and that more than I had ever anticipated for a simple little peace of jewelry.

In other news, I'm hoping to get a couple of articles from John Carlson posted this week (so my mom's students can read them. Hi again! If you want to, give her a big hug for me.).

Lisa's Memorial, more rosaries

Lisa's Memorial

I'm here at home today, taking a day off to honor Lisa's Memorial, as a way of saying goodbye because I can't be in Australia with Lisa's family. I plan to go on a nice hike later on today, as a way of saying goodbye. I did the same when we lost Aunt Jan and it's feels like a necessary release. My heart still goes out to her father, sister and brother and all of their families. They've been through so much this year and its hard to see them go through more. If you're reading this today, please take a moment to close your eyes and reflect on her memory.

Mary's Rosary

In the mayhem that's transpired in the last couple of weeks, I've neglected to put up a picture of the rosary that I made for Aunt Mary. I sent it out the same time I sent out the rosaries for all of Aunt Jan's family. I had made this specific rosary just to make one. Then Aunt Mary called and asked if she could have one, and this one felt like a perfect fit:



I found these lovely grey glass beads at one of my favorite bead stores awhile back. They just seemed tailor-made for a rosary. When Aunt Mary called, I knew this rosary was for her. I augmented the centerpiece with some of Aunt Jan's freshwater pearls, so now she has a little token of her sister and her mother with her.


Aunt Mary sent me a lovely thank you note that I thought I'd share:

I received the Rosary, I'm thrilled. It's so beautiful and lovingly made. Thank you so much. It has been blessed by my favourite hermit priest, Sr. Ronan. I love the beads and shall treasure it.

Can you believe it? A rosary I made was actually blessed by a priest. I was actually kind of blown away by that fact. I'm not sure why. Just kind of humbled I guess. I just feel really lucky to be doing this.

More on Lisa

Cyndi sent me the following note that she wants forwarded on to the rest of the family. I thought I'd share it here as well.

Lisa had a wonderful 12 months of life after her diagnosis. She fought hard to keep the cancer at bay and to live with energy and love. She called me Friday to tell me she felt fantastic and had heaps of energy and was hoping that she was getting better and was going to get rid of the tumour. On Saturday we went to a musical. On Sunday she woke up and was vomiting blood. She was admitted to hospital emergency 12.30 on Sunday lunch time and died at 10.50am 26.3.2007.

The tumour had encroached on a major blood vessel and there was no way we could stop the bleeding. They gave me two choices, one was to operate but the likely hood of her dying on the operating table was very high. Or she could just stop the blood transfusions and die peacefully. We all talked about it and she made the decision to stop the blood transfusions. She told me she was tired and she was ready to go. She was resigned to that and we spent the next 24 hours with her. We talked to her and she continued to give cheek back to us right up until 4.00 am that morning.

Her son Trent was informed and he made a phone call to her before she lost the power of speech. It was a wonderful conversation for her. He also sent a photo of himself but by the time we got the photo she was unable to open her eyes, although she did nod to me that she saw the photo, so maybe she had a peak.

The story of the rosary beads continue. I was in Brisbane when I got the call that Lisa was in the emergency room. So I went straight there, not really knowing the facts. Howard and the kids came down later that night to say good bye to Lisa and Fran had noticed that my rosary beads were in the bathroom, she picked them up and brought them to me. I put the beads on Lisa, which she wore for the last 12 hours of her life, and she will be cremated with those beads. My sister was my best friend, she was my confidant, she was the person that I turned to for advice on life and living, she was an amazing person with amazing knowledge and insight, I will miss her so much.

She is being cremated on Thursday at 9.00am. On Friday at 6.00pm we are having a celebration of her life. She was not a traditionalist so we will not be having a traditional funeral, just a great party. People are coming from far and wide. The head of the New Zealand School of Chiropractic called and told me he was coming, people from all over Australia respected her as a Chiropractor and a friend and are coming to celebrate a brilliant life.

Please put this on the blog if you think it is appropriate. The rosary beads have been a blessing and when Fran brought them to me I knew exactly what they were made for. They were a symbol of three great ladies, three generations now together watching over us, Grandma, Mum and my sister Lisa. My beads given to Lisa as she was dying was the part of me which has gone with her that can never be recovered. I will miss her greatly.

Can you also send this on to all the family, so that they know that Lisa died so very beautifully and peacefully.

As my mother so eloquently put it after I read this to her, there are no words. Or, perhaps there are three. Thank You Cyndi. You've been through so much lately, but the bond that we've forged together through the rosaries has been utterly priceless as is the fact that you've been willing to share these stories with us and with me . Thank you.

We'll miss you Lisa

I've been trying for a full day now to put into words a decent enough post trying to honor my cousin Lisa. It's been difficult because I've been bombarded with a diluge of other emotions that have been keeping me from it. We lost my cousin Lisa over the weekend. I just want to tell all of Lisa's family that I love them and I'm sending my thoughts and prayers their way.

When I found out about Lisa's passing yesterday, I felt unanchored, floating. I couldn't connect with anything. I talked with my husband to try and figure out my emotions. He said something striking. He said I wasn't just mourning Lisa's passing, but I was mourning them, everyone we've lost all over again. I think that's true.

Every time we lose someone in the family, my thoughts not only pause on that person but on all the others we've lost too. Since Lisa's passing yesterday, I've thought about Aunt Jan, and my grandmother, about cousin Randy, and of course all the brothers, all my uncles, their wives, their children. I can't help but sift through a catalogue of the lost. I keep running through memory after memory of each member that we've lost over the years.

It seems so unfair to face what we've faced as a family, to face what we've faced as individuals. I'm not sure that I can talk about all of this right now. It doesn't seem like the right time for me. I'll let John Carlson's articles say it for me.

As for Cousin Lisa, I'll say this. I remember one summer, before any of the uncles got too sick, we had all gathered in Iowa. A bunch of us decided to "float the river". It was a perfect summer day. I was in a canoe with Lisa and my mom, sitting in the middle, splashing the water around and getting splashed in return. Lisa and my mom didn't have the greatest of canoe skills and at one point, when we were about to dock for shore, they flipped the canoe over. Everything got soaked. Towels, our packed lunches, ourselves, we all took a plunge in the river. We laughed and joked about it. It was a sweet moment and I want to thank Lisa for giving it to me.

We'll all miss you.

Rosaries for Aunt Jan's family

I have several pictures of recent rosaries I created, but before I do that, I want to wish Lisa all the very best. I just got word from a relative that she's in the hospital and I want to send all my love and well wishes her way and also out to all her family. They've been through so much in the past year and I can't imagine how difficult this is for them now. I love you all and I'm wishing and praying for the best.

The following are pictures of all the rosaries and rosary bracelets I made using Aunt Jan's jewelry. I made each one completely different and unique from each other. There are eight in all, one for Uncle Dave, cousin Marcus, Cyndi, Lisa, and one for each of Aunt Jan's grandchildren, Fran, Brogan, Casie and Tarnia.

I made these two rosary bracelets for Jan's two daughters, Cyndi and Lisa.

Both use the cultured pearls from Aunt Jan's collection along with the pearl centerpiece from my grandmother's pearl necklace. One uses hematine accents while the other uses blue pearl accents. I believe Cyndi took the blue pearl bracelet while Lisa was given the pearl and hematine bracelet. I hope having both grandma and Jan's pearl's is a comfort and strength for her during this time.

I made two full length rosaries for both Uncle Dave and Marcus, each using a different piece of Aunt Jan's jewelry.

For Dave's rosary, I used the green stone beads from Aunt Jan's necklace along with some silver accents. I hope he thinks of Aunt Jan when he sees it because it reminds me of her.

For Marcus's, I kind of broke the mold and went a bit away from the traditional rosary look and feel.

I used the blue and bone beads from Aunt Jan's choker to represent the hail mary's and glory be's of a traditional rosary but used accent beadsalong with it, so its look isn't the same aesthetic as a rosary but it still has the same form and function.

For Aunt Jan's four grandchildren, I created four rosary bracelets, that also play with the look and feel of a normal rosary.

For Brogan, I used the same color scheme and ideas I used for Marcus's Rosary, playing on the bone and hematine. I also made the centerpiece of the rosary dettachable, so if he wanted to wear the bracelet by itself, he could.

Cyndi tells me Brogan really liked this bracelet and put it on almost immediately.

For Fran, I created a mixed rosary bracelet, using beads from two of Aunt Jan's necklaces.

I used a combination of the green stones that I also used for Dave's rosary and the cultured pearls I used for Cyndi and Lisa's bracelets. I think the two bead types combined quite well. Cyndi told me she was thinking of taking this one instead of the blue pearl bracelet instead, she liked it so much.

For Casie Ann and Tarnie I actually used the seed beads from Aunt Jan's green stone necklace to do things a bit differently.

In one, I used the small glass beads to form loops and in the other, I used the glass beads to create tiny little rosettes. In the one above, each loop represents a hail mary and in other, each small beaded flower represents one hail mary.

I'm really amazed how differently they've all turned out. I hope I've created something each person in the family likes. As always, if anyone would like me to change something, let me know and I'll be happy to change it.

Again, I'm sending my love and my thoughts to Lisa and all her family, hoping that she recovers from this harrowing experience. This is an awefully tough time for all the family involved, and I'm giving everyone my best.

Good Luck and lots of love.

Many Thanks to John Carlson

There's been a lot I've wanted to say about my grandmother and my family and the struggles and heartbreak that we've gone through and the heartache that my grandmother went through, but every time I try or even think about trying, everything gets jumbled up.

Luckily for me, there's John Carlson. He put pen to paper and wrote about our family in ways I only wished I could. Everything that we went through, he painstakingly documented. He's written a number or articles for his paper, The Des Moines Register, some regarding our family history and some regarding our grandmother. He even wrote an endearing and yet heartbreaking obituary when we lost our grandmother. Everything he has written has meant so much to me and to the family because he wrote what I wanted to write, said what I thought our family so desperately needed to say.

I just recently got in contact with Mr. Carlson, asking him if I could have electronic versions of everything that he wrote. I finally got to talk to him today and his answer was a resounding yes. Within hours he had handed me the most recent articles he wrote concerning my grandmother and the article he wrote concerning my uncle Loris with the promise of sending me the long article he wrote regarding the entire family.

I can not thank the man enough for his generosity and also for his passion. I'll attach the articles to the website soon so that they are readily available to read and reread. It's a special gift to have everything he's written in one place and I'm so happy I get share it with the rest of the family.

Again, thanks so much John Carlson, for the friendship you've had with my family over the years and also for this unique opportunity. I really appreciate it.

Aunt Jan's beads

As stated before, I've gotten the opportunity to work with and use Aunt Jan's beads in rosaries. I've utterly enjoyed the process because I think it's what she would've wanted. I thought I'd go into a little detail about the jewelry I received. Keep in mind that the pictures probably aren't the greatest (They were taken by me and not by the lovely and talented Teena Marie. You get what you pay for.)

My cousin Cyndi gave me two strands of Aunt Jan's pearls.

The first set is a strand of freshwater pearls. The second is a strand of cultured pearls. I love the set of cultured pearls and the clasp is really stunning and beautiful. I'm hoping to reuse it for something because it's not meant to sit in a box forever.

The next necklace was a blue and silver choker Jan wore often.

I actually remember this piece on Aunt Jan, which makes having it all the more special.

The next piece was a green stone and seed bead necklace.

I could see Aunt Jan wearing this with a nice summer dress, enjoying a nice summer day at the beach. I really enjoyed these beads. I used all the stones from this necklace and most of the seed beads.

The next was an interesting three-strand choker made out of bone and shell.

I really like this piece and have already used a lot of the beads in rosaries for Marcus and Brogan. I haven't quite figured out if I can use the long shell pieces in rosaries or not, but I've already gotten a lot of use out of this necklace so far.

Below is a montage of the rest of the necklaces I received but so far haven't used.

I'd like to thank Cyndi for the opportunity once again and also for her graciousness. I recieved a nice note with the package of beads from Cyndi that I'd like to share:

Here are the beades that no one claimed for their use. I've put the pearls in
because they were precious to Mum and I want everyone to have some of them. The silver necklace with the blue beads is a necklace Mum wore alot. I remember each
piece of jewelry on her. Enjoy and spread around to all family members.

Thanks Cyndi! I'll do just that.

The Big Announcement

I’ve promised for weeks that there would be a big announcement and I’ve finally gotten to a point that I can make that big announcement now.

Aunt Jan was an amazing person and an integral piece of the family. That probably goes without saying. She was also a lovely person that we’re all going to miss a lot. That also goes without saying. The thing that I haven’t had the opportunity to say, at least until now, is that I’ve gotten the chance to honor her memory along with my Grandmother’s by placing their beads together in rosaries. And Cyndi has allowed me the opportunity to use Jan’s beads to incorporate them into the rosaries for not only her family, but the rest of the extended family as well.

My cousin Cyndi sent me a handful of Jan’s beaded necklaces that she loved to wear. I’ve created rosaries and rosary bracelets for Uncle Dave, and my cousins Marcus, Lisa and Cyndi. I've also made rosary bracelets for Jan’s four grandchildren. I’ve kept it a surprise until now. Cyndi wanted to keep it between us until I finished them and sent them out. I’ve sent them out to Cyndi and she’ll distribute them to the rest of the family shortly.

Cousin Cyndi has been gracious and generous enough to give me the rest of the beads so that I can incorporate Jan’s beads with Grandma’s beads into all the rest of the rosaries. I’ve really enjoyed this process and have found that it has been a fitting and loving way to remember and honor Jan. As I was making one of the rosaries, I teared up a little bit, thinking of Jan.
I’ll post pictures of all the jewelry I received as well as the pictures of the rosaries I made in return (but in a later post). Hopefully soon I’ll post that video from Jan’s funeral I’ve been promising. I want to thank Cyndi for all of help and giving me this opportunity. I hope everyone enjoys them!

Wishing Lisa Well

I'm just dropping a brief word here to wish my Cousin Lisa well. She's had some health problems lately that, along with dealing with the loss of her mother Jan, have been a lot to deal with. She's coping and fighting but it sounds like she still has a ways to go. I just want to let her know that my thoughts are with her and that all the family hopes that she gets well and stays healthy.

We love you Lisa. Take care.

Updating the Rosaries

It's been awhile since I've updated the site and made new rosaries. For those of you that have requested rosaries and have helped me with content/suggestions, I truly apologize for the delay. The one year anniversary of my grandmother's death is fast approaching and this project has been on my mind a lot lately. It still feels very important and very necessary.

I plan to have a lot more content and rosaries available soon. As soon as I figure out how to load video onto the website (for a technical writer, you'd think I'd be more technically savvy about this website, but unfortunately that's not the case) I plan to post the video that Jan's kids made for her Jan's funeral. The piece is just gorgeous and amazing and I'd love to share it with the family.

For now, here's a few more pictures of rosaries I've had completed for a while.

They are a little fuzzy, but I hope they get the point across. There are two rosary bracelets, and a full length rosary. The first rosary bracelet is a pearl and hematine bracelet with one of the pearls from my grandmother's necklace in the middle. The other bracelet has milky white beads with brown glass bead accents and one of the beads from the purple and gold glass strand in the middle. The full length rosary has grey glass beads with pearl accents and as always my grandmother's pearls as accents by the crucifix.

The full length rosary is actually promised to my Aunt Mary, as soon as I make some minor adjustments. Also, the blue bracelet rosary pictured below is promised to my cousin Lisa, but the rest are up for grabs.

Keep tuned for the special video feature and a special announcement I have to make in the coming months.

Thoughts on Jan

I just received a nice note from my cousin Cyndi regarding my Aunt Jan that I find a bit of solice and happiness in. She asked me to share it with the rest of the family here on the blog. Thanks Cyndi, for your kind words and encouraging story:

Once again I must tell you how wonderful your blog is. Both Mum and Grandma are on there. For me I lost two generations in less then a year, it still seems so hard to believe. I told Mum a couple of weeks before she died that it wasn't fair. She had, had her mother until she was 68 and I wanted my mother until I was at least 68. But she just couldn't fight it. She was so beautiful till the end.

I'll let you know some of the things that have been happening.

I was really upset a couple of days after Mum died. I was alone sitting on a park bench over looking an oval and I looked up into the cloudy sky and as clear as clear was the capital letter "J" (with the line at the top), formed by the blue sky with the clouds as the outline. I kept rubbing my eyes and negating it when it disappeared and to the left of the J formed a pair of lips, this time in exactly the opposite way to the J. This time the clouds were the lips and the blue was the outline. The significance of the lips is that the only thing Mum could do in the last 24 hours was to pucker her lips for a kiss. During the day before she died she wouldn't let go of my hand, she would squeeze it if she needed anything. One time she squeezed it and I asked her if she wanted a drink, no reply, did she want something to eat, no reply. Then I asked Mum if she wanted me to get close to her, so she could say something, she squeezed my hand tightly. I came right up to her face. She puckered her lips, I kissed her and said " I love you too, Mum I always will!" We continued to do this for the rest of the day. Dad kissed her a half hour before she died because she puckered her lips for him.

The J was to tell me she was there and the lips were to tell me she loved me and that she would be there for me. From that minute on, the rest of the day was the most peaceful day of my life. Mum let me know in other ways that I was to stop trying to understand the world she now lived in that it was something I couldn't comprehend with my reality and to be at peace with it. I had always questioned life after death, but now I don't in any way. She also let me know that I no longer needed to phone her I could just talk to her when I needed her. My Mum is amazing!

The Saturday after the funeral, we decided to have a fun day with family, O'Meara's and Lovett's. We had a great day talking about the funny things Mum would do. At the end of the day we sat at a local pub, on the Mooloolah river, there was no one else there as it was storming. As the sun was setting I saw the most amazing red glow so I got out of my seat and walked towards the water and saw the most magnificent display. There were two rainbows over the water, but the only two colours that were prominent were lime green and red, Mum's favourite colours, she wore them all the time, they were the dominate colours in her wardrobe. I have never seen a rainbow with just two colours, it was quite magnificent.

Dad and Lisa and I were cleaning Mum's wardrobe out, we were about one third of the way through when Dad said to me "I wonder what your Mother doesn't want us to throw out". I said to Dad "She'll tell us don't you worry, she'll figure out a way". About five minutes later the phone rang, it was a friend of mine who is a medium, she rang to tell me that Mum had told her that it is just stuff, it should hold no sentimental value what so ever, give it away and make sure other people get to use it. Make the home your fathers, it is not mine anymore. So I went back into Dad and told him what my friend had said, it made the job so much easier. We cleaned out Mum's wardrobe, bathroom, linen cupboard and kitchen. In the kitchen there were two things we just couldn't throw away. One was Mum's Angel Food Cake Baking Tin, it held way to much significance. Dad, Lisa and I all said we wouldn't be making the cake but we knew that Jacki Postles our very close family friend (who is family, not by blood but in every other way) would take on the job of Angel Food
Cakes, so we gave the tin to her, she was very proud to be the one to take on the task. The other item we could not throw away was a glass dish that was always filled at dinner parties and at Christmas time with fudge and rum balls. I'm going to be the one that fills that.

My girl friend who is the Medium told me some other things; she said Mum had no
regrets in her life, that she loved her family more then anything and that she didn't need friends she had Dave and her children and grandchildren and her first family. Her purpose on earth was to serve as is her purpose in heaven.

Last October Mum and Dad took a 6 week trip around Canada and the United States. Before they left Mum told me she had written her funeral wishes out and they were on her computer. I said “What did you do that for”. She just smiled and said it was good to be organized. This is what she wrote September 9th 2005.

"If the people organizing my funeral have a different idea that’s okay too. I want it to be a celebration of my life. First of all with the family I was born into that loved, cared for me, and taught me the principles of being a follower of our Lord Jesus Christ and a good citizen of this marvelous world. The friends and parish priests I had as a child, teenager and young woman.

When I was 20 I met the love of my life, David who always supported me, took care of my physical and emotional needs and took me to a greater understanding of my
faith journey.

Next was Motherhood – the front line of humanity. David and I were so privileged to have 3 children – Lisa, Cyndi and Marcus – who gave us a tremendous amount of love and a few challenges, just enough to teach us the lessons we needed to know to continue our faith journey. I am so proud of my children. They are all responsible,
achievers, givers, careers and have made a positive difference to the world we live in.

We have a wonderful son-in-law, Howard and daughter-in-law, Susannah who have enhanced our family’s lives.

We have 5 delightful grandchildren – Trent, who we only saw for a few brief weeks,
Brogan, Casie, Tarnea and Fran. They are vibrant, fun to be with and each have a wonderfully unique disposition and have also made a positive difference to the world we live in.

"THANK YOU ALL FOR THE EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE! I WILL LOVE YOU FROM HEAVEN AS I HAVE LOVED YOU ON EARTH!"

I know Mum is doing just that.

Love Cyndi

Thanks Cyndi. We're all sending much love your way.

We'll Miss You, Aunt Jan

I just got word last night that my aunt Jan passed away. Words can not express how heartbroken I am by this news. Jan was this amazing spirit with this unstoppable energy and I'm very saddened that she is gone.

My condolences and love go out to her family; uncle Dave, cousin Marcus and his wife, cousin Lisa, cousin Cindy and her family. My thoughts and prayers are with you. My thoughts and prayers are with the entire family too. Mom, I wish I was home to hug you right now. Uncle Steve, I wish I could hug you too. We've been through so much together that it seems daunting to have to go through more, to lose yet another loved one.



Although, to every dark cloud, there is a silver lining. My mom said that from the moment she recieved it, my aunt Jan had been holding onto the rosary I made. I found out it brought her a lot of comfort to be holding a rosary made with some of my grandmother's jewelry. Apparantly, it had become such a fixture with her when they prepared her body, they made sure the rosary was placed in her hands. When I heard this, I immediately burst into tears. I didn't expect the rosary to be so impactful on Jan, or her family it seems.

Given this, there time of need, I'd like to send Marcus, Lisa, Cindy, and uncle Dave if he wants one, a rosary. I'll be writing them an e-mail shortly to ask if they'd like one. I'm acutely aware now, more than ever, how much our family needs to stay in touch, and how much a simple act like this one that I've been neglecting can have on a family.

Get Well Aunt Jan

I just want to take a moment to wish my Aunt Jan a speedy recovery. She recently found out she is ill and I just want to let her know that our thoughts and prayers are with her. Good luck with everything and I hope all goes well. I'm rooting for you over here across the pond.

Tylia